Update on Ainsley

So many of you have emailed or called, wanting to know how Ainsley is doing. First, let me say, "thank you". It means the world to me to know you are concerned, and it helps tremendously to know there is support out there. It's like 100 arms are extending through my monitor to hold my hand or pat my shoulder. It is really uplifting.

Ainsley is doing better this week. Much of what she is going through right now is typical 3 year-old limit testing, just magnified by the intensity of her personality. I have been trying to get her to focus on new things so she doesn't spend so much time in her fantasy world. Occasionally, this seems to work by shortening the length of her tantrums and lessening their severity.

Giving her frequent play dates with her best friend, Georgia, is also helping. Georgia is extremely patient and kind. She gives Ainsley her space when she needs it and welcomes her back with open arms when the time is right. Her brother, Jack, is Ian's best friend. He, too, shows friendship at a depth far greater than is typical for his age. I am extremely grateful that these children have found each other. They seem to bring out the best in each other.

This is also a self-declared pajama week for Ainsley. She has been in street clothes for a total of 10 hours at the most since Monday. Her refusal to get dressed was a tremendous source of frustration for all of us the first couple of days. But she is much more agreeable in her pj's, so we're going with it for now. Next week, it's back to school and back to appropriate attire - like it or not.

As with Ian, I have to pick my battles and allow each child the opportunity to control some aspects of their environment, even if it isn't necessarily something I would choose for myself. I am there to make sure they are safe. Hopefully, each will learn from the decisions they make.

I will still have her evaluated, but I may wait just a bit longer to make certain I can document the behavior patterns, not individual instances. It is still difficult to know what is sibling imitation and what is a true personality characteristic.



What I do know, is this is a beautiful child.


Yesterday, as I teased and tickled her, we had this dialogue:

Mom: "Are you a silly bunny?"

Ainsley: [giggles] "No, Mommy!"

Mom: "Are you a green frog?"

Ainsley: [more laughter] "No, Mommy!"

Mom: "Are you a hairy gorilla?"

Ainsley: "No, Mommy! I'm not a hairy gorilla!"

Mom: "Then, what are you?"

Ainsley: "I'm your best friend."